Letters to Hope

I was thinking of this the other day and thought it would be nice to tell you a little about your father and I since I was always curious about that kind of stuff when I was young, about my parents and most of it they could not remember.

Joseph: Daddy

Ok, about your father…

(I will mention all the good things about him you will soon learn that everyone had bad qualities but is it not nice to talk about them or mention them too often.)

Joseph was born in White Plaines New York in October 1974. He moved to Florida with two of his friends on St. Patrick’s Day at the age of 22.

They had large dreams and big hopes of opening up a club in down town Miami and making millions. But, of course, like so many young people with dreams it fell through. He ended up working at a club as a bouncer instead.

How We Met

Joseph met Isis in July 1998 at the club where he worked and was introduced through mutual friends.

We quickly fell in love and could not be separated from each other.

As young love goes we did have a couple of bumps in the road. We did not get married until April of 2004 and very much planned to have a baby shortly after getting married.

I Want to Get Married Now!

I wanted to get married much sooner but your father had very different plans. He wanted to be well established have a house and a good job and be able to support his family. At the time I could not see why being married earlier would change his plans, but as I get older I see his wisdom in waiting.

If we had gotten married early in our relationship before both of us were ready it untimely would have destroyed our relationship. It was the best thing we could have done was to wait and grow together to see if we did not in time grow apart.

Marriage is Forever

I think our relationship will last forever because we learned so much about each other before we made such a large commitment to each other. Marriage is not to be taken lightly and there is no shame in waiting as long as you want. Just realize that once you make that commitment you should plan on staying together forever.

More About Mrs. Isis Elfman

Ok, back to me. Ha ha.

Isis was born in July 1976 in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida. I only lived in one other place besides Florida.

When I was younger — 8 through 12 — I lived in Holland with my mother and, at the time, step father. We moved back when I was 12 and I lived with my father until I was about 14 and then I moved back in with my mother.

Once she divorced my step father we lived with each other until I was about 17 and then I moved out.

Before Daddy, Relationships Not So Great

I had a few not so great relationships before I met your father as did he.

Young love is often very complicated. I swore when I was younger that I had fallen in love 20 times but as I got older I realized it was only “puppy love” and nothing compared to how much I love your father. I keep mentioning this because I want you to realize how much love means to us. And how being in love is very important in life. And how together, in love, we made you and that is how all children should be made.

Not a Mistake: You Were Born of Love

So many children these days are born as mistakes or born from two non-loving people or are just not cared for and I think this is so sad.

I have to say that before you came along I had cast aside three unborn children in my younger days. I knew I was not in love and was not ready and never wanted to be selfish in the sense to bring a child into the world and not be prepared to love that child completely and with my whole heart. Often when you are young you do not realize how to love or how much love it takes to go through certain sacrifices in your life and you are selfish only because you are young and do not understand.

I am sure through your life you will often hear me say you are too young for this or just wait until you are a little older. I only say this from my own experiences and realizing now how much I went through and not wanting you to go through the same thing. Although I know just like my mom knew that you will make a lot of the same mistakes that I did just because you will think that I do not know what I am talking about and that is ok. Just like me you will realize mom was right.

No Instructions: We Learn Together

I am just trying to write down all the little lessons I want to teach you. Children do not come with instructions and we will both be learning together. And since you will be my only child (as far as your father and I have talked about at this point in our lives we only want one child but who can tell once you are born we might want more) I want to instill as much wisdom in you as possible.